Today’s Reminder: I am powerless over alcohol and its effects on another person; I cannot make him sober, no more than I can be responsible for his drinking. The first Step tells me this and it tells me, too, that I must acknowledge that my life has become unmanageable. My first task is to manage my own life, whether or not the alcoholic is still drinking.
“Help me find peace of mind within myself by uniting myself with God’s power and guidance. That is the spiritual way out of my difficulties- the only sure way.”
Excerpt from One Day At A Time In Al-Anon, pg. 116
We can no more be in control of when the sun rises or be the cause of the sun rising than we can be in control of another human being’s actions. No matter how much we want health and happiness for another we can not make them want it. And even if and when they do want it, is not us that can give it to them. That is where compassion for ourselves becomes essential. How devastating to make ourselves believe that we can do something and to make ourselves responsible for another human being. That is a huge weight to carry. Being responsible for ourselves, both our chaos and our successes, is enough. Revisiting the first step is a gift to ourselves. It is important to remember both sides of this coin in our lives. It is the thing that brings the chaos into our lives, the illusion of control, and it is the thing that can bring the most freedom, the acceptance of powerlessness ~Adrienne